Violence
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"Actions, rhetoric, and consequences are not separate islands—they feed each other."
I have read this sentence in a few places and would like to attribute it to someone, yet I am not finding the direct source. I do find wisdom here though. And, in addition to actions, rhetoric, and consequences, I also add 'thought' to this sequence as it naturally precedes the others. Most importantly, what I find interlaced between thought, action, rhetoric, and consequence is our own deeply personal and reactive nature.
So much of what we pay attention to moment by moment is deeply reactive. Current events are triggering. And paying deep attention to these events feeds a certain kind of addiction to the drama. We know this, right? We're drawn in and we immediately lose our perspective and commitment to be present, thoughtful, clear, and communicative. This isn't our fault. This is how we're wired. Sure, we can be balanced within this all without being inundated, yet balance is not easy to find for most of us once we dive in. The world is not black and white, not cookie cutter, and yet our reactive systems try to make us believe this to be true. Us vs. Them. Right vs. Wrong. Left vs. Right. You catch my drift.
So then, much of how we're moving collectively nowadays comes from this reactive and fractal place in our system. Violence also comes from this place in our system. The traumas we have sustained (and are sustaining) come from this system. I'm not saying you are a violent and traumatized person... yet here we are. We're human. And we're hurting.
We need to heal. All of us. And it starts with the person you see in the mirror, not the person on the other end of your pointed finger/accusation. It starts with the voice(s) in your head. It starts with your thoughts and thought process. It starts with being held accountable. It starts with understanding we can carry this responsibility for ourselves, and we can help to carry it for one another. I do not think we can do this by ourselves, and we certainly cannot do it in our shallow echo chambers. This is going to take work.
Truthful, peaceful, and deeply productive conversations need to happen. Everywhere. Now. Pointing fingers and placing blame... especially on social media? This goes nowhere. Time to move forward. Time to evolve.
I can share that two family members have died due to gunshot wounds. I was raised by an angry and verbally abusive mother whose volume and intensity increased steadily as she got older. I was four months pregnant with my daughter on this tragic day twenty-four years ago. I have actively worked with depression and suicidal thoughts since I was fourteen. I am no stranger to violence and the voices in my head, and I know full well my own reactive nature. I was raised to fight and to push through. To be hard. I can access this even now, yet it is not my nature. It is not where I am in balance. I speak freely about these things, especially with my daughter, because I have needed to heal these places within myself. She deserves to know the truth, and she too deserves to heal from these generational patterns.
This is why I do the work I do. It inspires me every single day. It starts with me; the woman I see in the mirror. I want to be held accountable for my thoughts, actions, and rhetoric; and I sure do want to be aware of the consequences.
We can all do this. Together. Bless our path.
Until next time I offer these words of wisdom for better or for worse. Please take them with a grain of salt for we each live our own individual truths. Our mission while we are here is to understand, accept, and celebrate that one very simple, but incredibly significant fact. For all this, I am grateful.